


more than meets the eye

by dear_universe



Category: Keeper of the Lost Cities Series - Shannon Messenger
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Asexual Linh, Bi-ana, Bisexual Biana, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gay Dex, Gay Fitz, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Lesbian Linh, M/M, Memory Loss, Mild Blood, Minor Violence, Pansexual Keefe, Pansexual Sophie, Queer Tam, SHIP IT LIKE FEDEX, Sorry Not Sorry, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, actually i am a bit sorry but not really lmao, cursing, homophobic parents, keeper of the gays, lgbt keeper, like a lot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-17
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-10-30 11:22:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 33
Words: 18,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17827625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dear_universe/pseuds/dear_universe
Summary: the neverseen have been defeated, and the elven world is at peace. that is, until dex and fitz realize their feelings... for each other. in a world with no love for those who dare to defy the norm, will dex and fitz be able to make it?their discovery will change the lives, and the world around them, forever.homophobes back off!





	1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

“You know, that's never going to work,” Fitz grinned as he watched Sophie clamber up onto Keefe’s shoulders. “You won't be able to reach it.” 

“But I need it!” Biana wailed, gazing mournfully up at her makeup case, wedged in the branches of the tallest tree on the grounds of Everglen. “In case you forgot, I’m having lunch in Atlantis tomorrow, and I'm not going looking like I just got mauled.” 

“Just because you don't wear makeup doesn't mean you look like you got mauled,” Sophie replied snappishly. “This is all your fault,” she told the top of Keefe’s head, giving it a light smack. Keefe faked a look of great agony as he straightened and began to levitate. Sophie shrieked and smacked him again as he lurched, almost throwing her off.

“Stop hitting me, Foster,” he complained. “You'll mess up my hair.” 

“Oh, to heck with you and your hair,” Sophie retorted. As they drew near to the makeup case, it rose and flew away, cackling. 

“Why did you ever think it would be a good idea to give my makeup case a Malicious Mauve potion from Slurps and Burps?” Biana sobbed.

“I didn't think it would be a good idea,” Keefe grinned. “I thought it would be fun. They're usually different, you know.” 

“Hey, can I talk to you?” A voice whispered in Dex’s ear, making him jump. He whirled around and glared viciously at Fitz.

“Isn't that what you're doing right now?” Dex shot back waspishly. “Unfortunately,” he added under his breath. Fitz looked hurt, but he plowed ahead anyway.

“I mean, in private,” Fitz replied, emphasizing the last word. Dex felt his cheeks get hot and forced his blush down. He didn't know why he was blushing. He shouldn't be blushing, really. He didn't trust himself to speak, for some reason, so he nodded curtly.

Fitz led Dex into Everglen, up a flight of stairs, and into his bedroom.

“We need to talk,” he started, as the door swung shut behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the moment everything changed

**Chapter Two**

“How can I get you to like me?” Fitz asked. Dex’s breathing quickened when he noticed how close Fitz was to him. Fitz’s glittering teal eyes were inches from his own. 

“You already have,” Dex breathed, then clapped a hand over his mouth. “I can't believe I said that,” he mumbled through his palm. Fitz’s face split into an irresistible grin, and Dex felt like his insides were turning to mush. Fitz leaned closer.

“Here's a little secret,” he whispered in Dex’s ear. Den felt like his heart was going to pound out of his chest. “I like you too,” Fitz murmured, his nose now touching Dex’s. Dex let out a little whimper, whether of fear or longing he didn't know, and Fitz laughed. 

“Scared?” He teased, brushing his fingers against those of the boy in front of him.

“Maybe,” Dex replied, chin raised in defiance, but his voice hitched at the end. Fitz’s laugh filled his ears. “What are you going to do about it?” Dex challenged, but he couldn't hide the quaver in his words. 

“This,” Fitz grinned. He cupped Dex’s jawline in his soft hand, pulling the other boy close and pressing their lips together.

Dex felt like he should close his eyes, but they were wide open. He couldn't stop staring. Noticing that Dex was stiff as a board and seemingly in shock, Fitz pulled away. 

“Is something wrong?” Fitz asked, concern etched upon his beautiful face. “Was it… I mean, uh…” For once, Fitz was the one acting awkward and uncomfortable. Now it was Dex’s turn to laugh. 

“Well, you know what they say…” he said, smirking. “If at first you don't succeed, try try again.” 

Fitz's lips quirked up in a small smile, which grew to a massive one. His hand slipped to Dex’s shoulders. They whiled the afternoon away, not thinking of the consequences, but only of each other.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> crush no longer

**Chapter Three**

“Fitz, at least attempt to pay attention!” Tiergan sighed, snapping his fingers in front of the prodigy’s face. Fitz started, blushing when he realized he held the gaze of two sets of eyes.

“Sorry,” Fitz mumbled, looking down at his hands. Tiergan smiled kindly down at him.

“It's alright. Now, please continue with your Cognate training.” 

“Can I enter your mind?” Sophie asked, smiling a little at him.

“Can I enter yours instead?” He replied. She gave him a wary look but nodded. The swirling colors and sharp thoughts of her mind overwhelmed him, but it grew easier each time. 

_I'm in!_ Fitz called out, following the trail to her emotional center. It was currently a soft lilac, tinged blue at the edges. _Why are you worried?_

_You've been acting so strange lately,_ Sophie replied. _You're not paying attention, you're always sneaking off, and you never want to come over. And now you won't let me enter your mind. I feel like you're hiding something from me._ Blue swirled around Fitz, jabbing him and fading from light to dark. _Are you?_

_I'm sorry,_ he responded, trying to ease her sadness. _I've been busy lately._

_You didn't answer my question._ Harsh, accusing red light swept him up, and for a minute he thought about telling her. Would it really be so bad? Hadn't she proved, after all they'd been through, that he could trust her?

_I'll tell you,_ he decided, _if you tell me your secret. The one you’ve been hiding from me._

Out loud, Sophie sucked in her breath and gripped the arms of her chair. Green waves of nausea rolled over Fitz, and he reached out an arm to steady her. He could feel her trembling. 

_Okay,_ Sophie finally said. _Okay._ Gray stripes ran through Fitz’s vision, and Sophie’s mind filled with an emotion he couldn't identify. _Fitz, the truth is…_

Fitz listened with bated breath. 

_I have a crush on you._

Fitz's heart stopped. 

_Or at least, I used to._


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> both fitz and the truth come out

**Chapter Four**

“What do you mean, you used to?!” Fitz burst out. Tiergan glanced at him, startled. 

“Try and keep your conversations telepathic, please,” Tiergan reminded them. Fitz nodded before re-entering Sophie's mind. 

_I'm sorry!_ Sophie squeaked. _It's, I don't know, I..._

Fitz could see Sophie’s cheeks flushing as a pair of ice blue eyes blossomed in her mind. _Keefe?_ Fitz asked, incredulous. _You like him?_ He began to laugh, adding in a snort every now and then. 

_Stop it!_ Sophie frowned. _You have to tell me your secret now._

Fitz turned white and stopped laughing at once. _You're going to hate me,_ he replied, shrinking in his seat. 

_I could never hate you,_ Sophie assured him, placing a comforting hand on his arm. 

_I'm not so sure,_ Fitz sighed. 

_A deal’s a deal,_ she told him. _You have to tell me._

_Sophie…_ Fitz took a deep breath and let it out. _Sophie, I kissed Dex._

_You WHAT?_ Sophie mentally shrieked. 

_I kissed Dex,_ Fitz repeated. 

_You mean to tell me,_ Sophie began. She was using a dangerous voice he recognized from years of living with Biana and Della. _That you kissed my best friend? You kissed Dex?_

_Umm, yeah._ Fitz didn't think he had ever been so nervous in his whole life. 

Sophie was completely silent. She remained that way, impervious to his pleas for a response until it was time for the next session. _Bye,_ Sophie whispered in the corner of his mind before leaving the room. 

Fitz walked out of the room, ignoring Tiergan, and sank to the floor in front of his locker. 

“What have I done?” Fitz moaned. His world faded to black as he drifted off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gay bonding

**Chapter Five**

“Hey, Wonder Boy, wake up!” A familiar voice wove its way into Fitz's dreams. Dreams of an afternoon best remembered under the cover of darkness. 

“Dex?” Fitz mumbled, cracking one eye open. Teal met periwinkle, and Fitz's eyes widened. “What are you doing here?” Fitz asked, staring at him in disbelief.

“I could ask you the same thing,” Dex replied, concern creasing his forehead as he looked down on the other. 

“I… I…” All of a sudden, Fitz realized how close they were. He could feel Dex’s breath warm on his cheeks, and those sparkling periwinkle eyes were inches from his own. Dex blushed and backed away. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “Um, I electrocuted myself and my mentor sent me to go see Elwin. And I saw you here, asleep, and, um…” Dex trailed off, running a hand through his strawberry blond hair, eyes on the floor. “At least it's Friday,” he added. Fitz rose to his feet and leaned against a wall next to Dex. 

“I had to tell Sophie,” Fitz sighed. “For Cognate training.” Dex looked at him with curiosity, cocking his head like a puppy. 

“Tell her what?” Dex questioned, so innocent. 

“About, you know…” Fitz gestured at his face, then Dex’s, whose cheeks flamed. 

“Oh,” Dex swallowed. “That.” There was a moment of silence as they both sat in thought. “What'd she say?” 

“Well, she kind of yelled at me for a second, and then she wouldn't say anything. She left.” Thick tension replaced the air, and Dex finally cut it with a heaving sigh. 

“So I lost my best friend for an afternoon with you, Wonder Boy?” Dex asked, a slight smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. 

“I guess so.” Fitz glanced at Dex, and his lips quirked upward. “Was it worth it?” 

“Maybe,” Dex replied, flashing his dimples. Then he thought of Sophie, and his heart sank. “No. Not Sophie. Someone else, yes… but not Sophie.” Fitz nodded in agreement. 

“You should probably go to the hospital wing,” Fitz told him. “Your hair’s still on end.” Fitz reached out and touched the singed ends of Dex’s hair. 

“Yeah,” Dex agreed, breathless. “Yeah, I probably should.” And yet neither of them moved. Neither of them wanted to. 

If they could've, they would've stayed there forever.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sophie makes dex feel better by roasting him

**Chapter Six**

“Sophie?” Dex called, knocking softly on the door of her bedroom. No response. He knocked again, louder this time. “Sophie, please let me in.” Silence. 

“The door’s unlocked,” a little voice came from inside. Dex sighed with relief and stepped inside the room. Sophie lay face up on her bed, still in her Foxfire uniform, minus the cape. 

“Um…” Dex mumbled, ever awkward. “Hi.” 

“Hi,” Sophie replied. Her eyes never left the ceiling. After a tense minute of silence, she continued. “You kissed Fitz,” she stated in a dull voice. 

“Well, it was more like he kissed me, but… yeah,” Dex mumbled. 

Sophie rolled over on her side to look at him. “I don't understand,” she sighed. “I mean, I know what this is. I've seen it before, with humans. But I didn't think elves could…” 

“Could what?” Dex asked, anxious. 

“I thought all elves were, you know, boy plus girl equals perfect life. I didn't know some of them were… other.” Sophie blinked and seemed to focus on Dex for the first time. Dex noticed that she had red, swollen eyes, and a wrinkled uniform. 

“Why are you so upset by this?” He asked, a hint of accusation creeping into his voice. “You shouldn't be. As you said, you've seen it before. So why does this bother you?” 

A tear trickled down Sophie's cheek, and she shook her head. Guilt built in Dex’s stomach, but he pushed it away. Guilt was too dangerous.

“I'm not mad at you,” Sophie told him, wiping her eyes on the back of her hand. “I'm mad because it's you, Dex.” 

Dex shook his head, not understanding. 

“Because your parents are a ‘bad match’. Because your siblings are triplets. Because you're already teased and beat down every day, and all this is going to do is make it worse.” 

“So we won't tell anyone.” Dex’s voice became rushed and panicky. “It'll be a secret, and no one need ever know.” 

“You won't be able to keep it up forever. What about when you get your match lists? Or if someone sees something, or hears something, or… there are so many ways it could go wrong.” 

Dex slumped against the wall, discouraged. “So we should just give up,” he replied, halfway to listless. “Just… just be friends.” The words pained him to no end, but he tried to put on a brave face. 

“That's not what I meant,” Sophie assured him. “I have a plan.” 

Dex perked up at once. 

“The first step? Get your friends on your side.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> panakes = makeout tree, apparently

**Chapter Seven**

Sophie sat beneath Calla’s Panakes, waiting for him to arrive. He had promised he would be here ten minutes ago, but he was late. 

“Hey, Foster!” Two hands slipped around Sophie's waist, and she screamed. Keefe laughed and stepped back, raising his hands in surrender. 

“Keefe!” Sophie yelled, her face bright red and her fists clenched. “Don't do that!” 

“Whoops, sorry, my hands slipped,” Keefe smirked. “Anyway, you had something ‘very important’ that you wanted to tell me?” Sophie nodded, still glaring at him. 

“And you should take it seriously, since it involves your best friend,” she replied, glaring at him. “Because, um… Fitz kissed Dex,” she blurted. 

Keefe remained quiet, but he sank to the ground, grabbing Sophie's hand and pulling her down with him. He didn't let go. Sophie exhaled and rested her head on Keefe’s shoulder. He froze for a second, then relaxed, letting her lean into him as they watched a petal drift to the ground. 

“Everything’s changing, isn't it?” Keefe sighed, resting his cheek against the top of Sophie's head. She nodded slightly, not wanting to dislodge him. “The Neverseen are gone, and the Council, well… they've gotten better. Kinda. But this… I dunno, it feels…” 

“Dangerous? Worrisome? Troubling?” Sophie supplied. 

“Any of those work.” Keefe was rubbing his thumb in circles on the back of her hand, making tingles run up and down her spine. He lifted his head, and Sophie tried not to feel too disappointed as he turned to face her. “There is one other change I've been wanting to make for a while, you know.” Keefe's voice cracked a little with nervousness. Sophie's heart was racing a mile a minute.

“What?” She asked, breathless. Keefe didn't bother answering. He simply slipped his hands around her waist for the second time that day and kissed her on the mouth. Sophie was shocked for half a heartbeat, then responded with surprising enthusiasm. She wrapped her arms around his neck and melded their lips together. When they came up for air, Keefe stared at her in amazement.

“Woah, Foster. I think you need to add ‘Great Kisser’ to your list of abilities.” Keefe grinned, playing with her hair and making her feel dizzy. Sophie swatted him on the arm, but he just laughed and pulled her against his chest, kissing her again. 

This was one change that Sophie was definitely okay with. 

More than okay, in fact. Far more than okay. 

Closer to ecstatic.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> keefe is dangerous(ly hot)

**Chapter Eight**

“What is going on here?” Grady roared. His eyes were locked on Keefe, who quickly detangled himself from Sophie, blushing. “Leave. Now.” 

Keefe ducked his head and held up his home crystal, waving at Sophie before stepping into the light. 

“Dad, I'm sorry!” Sophie began at once, but Grady held up a hand to silence her, his head bowed. After a few minutes of intense quiet, Grady looked up. Sophie saw tears glistening in the corners of his blue eyes. 

“All I want is to keep you safe,” he whispered, enveloping her in his arms. Sophie burst into tears. 

“I'm sorry,” she said into his chest. “It's just…” 

“I know, I know,” Grady huffed. “But why does it have to be That Boy?” He sighed. 

Sophie shook her head. “Stop calling him that!” She admonished, annoyed. 

“I'll stop calling him that the day you marry, be it to him or someone else. Don't forget, you haven't gotten your match lists yet.” 

Sophie noticed how hopeful he sounded about the last part and rolled her eyes. And yet, her heart filled with joy as she walked into her bedroom. 

Until she saw the note.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oops here's some angst

**Chapter Nine**

Three words can change everything.

_Tam hates me._

Sophie shook her head and reread the note, but it said exactly what she had thought it said. Which meant that her relationships with everyone she loved were in serious danger. But this wasn't about her. This was about Dex, and Fitz, and everything they were facing. And she was determined to help them. 

Sophie scribbled a note on a stray piece of paper for Grady and Edaline before light leaping to Everglen. She had no doubt she'd find Dex there. He knew his true friends. 

“Dex!” Sophie called, running through the gates and through the grounds of Everglen. “Fitz!” 

“Over here!” He responded, and she ran towards the sound of his voice. She found Fitz sitting cross-legged under a massive tree. Dex was stretched out with his head in Fitz's lap, his eyes wide and empty. “He won't tell me anything,” Fitz added. 

“Dex,” Sophie said in a soft voice, reaching out and putting a hand on his forehead. “Dex, please tell me what happened.” Dex rolled over, and his eyes met Sophie's. 

“I hate him,” Dex whispered. “I hate Tam Song.” 

“What happened?” Fitz worried, taking Dex’s hand in his own. 

Dex started and looked at their joined hands, but he seemed to draw strength from this show of affection. He began to speak. 

“You said we should get our friends on our side, so I decided to start with Tam and Linh. I figured they would be pretty easy to ally with, since they hate discrimination. You know, the whole twins thing.” 

Fitz and Sophie nodded in agreement. 

“Linh was fine with it, but Tam…” Dex shuddered. “He said I was a weirdo, a freak that shouldn't exist, a horrible sinner, and to stay away from him and Linh.” Dex’s voice cracked. “He hit me.” 

“What?” Fitz and Sophie yelled. Dex lifted the side of his shirt. Sophie gasped when she caught sight of the knuckle marks, right above a finger-shaped burn.

“I'm going to kill him,” Fitz growled. “I'm going to kill that stupid-” 

“Don't,” Dex interrupted harshly. “I never want to see that jerk again, and besides, I don't need you to fight my battles for me.” 

Fitz looked angrier than ever, with a touch of hurt. 

“I want to protect you,” he replied. Dex shook his head, standing up and turning to face Fitz. 

“Guys, I have to go,” Sophie told them with a pained expression, waving her Imparter at them. The name “Grady” was flashing on the screen. Neither Dex nor Fitz took any notice of her, and after a minute of anxious hovering, she leaped away. 

“Why do you even care what that idiot thinks?” Fitz yelled, rising to his feet. To his surprise, Dex colored slightly and looked away.

“I don't care what he thinks,” Dex mumbled, but he wouldn't meet Fitz's eyes. Fitz shook his head in disgust. 

“I knew I shouldn't have bothered with you,” Fitz snarled. He turned and ran back to Everglen.

“Fitz, wait!” Dex called, but Fitz was already gone. Dex punched a tree, which did nothing but bruise his fist as much as his heart. With an angry sigh, he held up his home crystal and leaped away.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> biana gets what she wants, as per usual

**Chapter Ten**

“I'm worried about them. They were still fighting when I left,” Sophie sighed. 

“What were they fighting about?” Biana asked, painting her lips a soft persimmon that set off her sparkling teal eyes. 

“Oh, you know, this and that,” Sophie replied vaguely, running a brush through her tangled hair. Biana nodded, understanding, then sat next to Sophie and assisted her friend with her hair. 

“I'm glad you came over,” Biana smiled, braiding Sophie's hair into a thick plait that went over one shoulder. “I haven't seen you much lately.” 

Sophie nodded in agreement. 

“Ohmigosh, you look sooooooooo cute like this!” Biana shrieked, whipping out a mirror to show Sophie, who blinked at herself in surprise.

“I look… not terrible,” Sophie admitted, and Biana laughed at her. 

“Of course you do, silly! I don't think it's possible for you to look terrible,” Biana assured her, cheeks pink. “Hey, you know what happens in Level 5, right?” She added, changing the subject. 

“What?” Sophie asked with a sense of foreboding.

“Matchmaking packets!” Biana squealed, bouncing up and down on her bed. Sophie groaned and flopped down beside her friend. 

“Do we have to fill them out?” She moaned, tugging out a loose eyelash and flicking it onto the floor. 

“You’ll have to eventually.” Biana rolled her eyes. “Come on, Sophie. Fitz and Keefe were held back to our year cause of that whole thing with the Neverseen. And they waited to fill out their packets with us, so we can all do them together! Puh-leeeeeeeeease?” Biana wheedled. Sophie rolled her eyes. 

“Fine,” she mumbled, and Biana squeaked with joy. “But good luck convincing the rest of them.” 

“Tomorrow,” Biana ordered Sophie. “Promise me, tomorrow.” 

“I promise,” Sophie sighed, though she could think of a million things she'd rather do on a Saturday morning. _For Biana,_ she thought. _This is just for Biana._

At least, that's what she told herself.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> flirty flirt flirt

**Chapter Eleven**

“How did I get talked into this?” Keefe groaned, chucking a pencil at Biana, who shrieked and ducked. “What can I say? I'm a sucker for a pretty face.” He winked at Biana, who blushed and smiled. Sophie glared at the both of them. 

“Let's compare answers, Keefe,” she asserted. She moved closer and placed a possessive hand on his knee. 

Biana eyed them with suspicion but went back to helping Linh. 

Tam hadn't bothered to come. 

Dex sat on the floor, filling out his matchmaking packet. He didn't talk to anyone, and no one seemed to notice him. Or at least, that's what he thought. 

“Hi,” Fitz mumbled, sitting close to Dex, who averted his eyes and continued to fill out his packet. “Listen, I'm sorry.” Dex continued to ignore him, and Fitz began to read over his shoulder. “ _Wanted attributes for a good match: dark hair, teal eyes, gorgeous smile…_ ” Fitz trailed off. 

“It's okay,” Dex sighed. “You're forgiven.” Fitz laughed, his face breaking into an adorable grin as he did a victorious little fist pump. He gave Dex a hug, then pulled away when he noticed Biana watching them. He instead focused on comparing their match lists. 

“Your favorite color is green too?” Fitz asked, surprised. Dex nodded. 

“I always feel guilty liking it, though, because that's the color we wear to-” 

“Funerals,” Fitz finished, his eyes clouding over. They both fell silent for a minute, thinking of the various funerals they'd been to. 

“Do you ever do this weird thing,” Dex spoke at last. “Where you look at people and try to imagine their lives before we came along?” Fitz nodded with enthusiasm. The two continued to talk with enthusiasm, oblivious to the fact that they were being watched. 

Linh Song observed the two boys talking, trying not to cry. It wasn't fair that they both had it so easy, that they could just _talk_ when she... but nevermind. She turned back to Biana, erasing all bitterness from her heart. 

“I'm not sure what to put for this ‘favorite hair color’ question. I mean, red hair is SO pretty, but then black hair…” Biana caught Linh’s eye and blushed. “I'll just put black,” Biana finished hurriedly before moving on to the next question. She seemed to feel the need to discuss each one. In detail. 

“Biana, I love you, but can you please take a turn helping me with my packet?” Linh asked, exasperated. 

Biana stared at her in shock. “You love me?” 

Linh blushed a deep scarlet. “I just… I didn't mean… will you help me or not?” She finished, feeling very stupid. 

Biana was nice enough to act as if it had never happened. She instead focused her energy on helping Linh fill out her matchmaking packet. It contained hundreds of personal questions, which made it both frustrating and embarrassing. 

Linh didn't mind so much now that Biana was helping her. Especially since Biana had scooted closer to her on Havenfield’s white couch. Their knees were pressed together, and neither of them seemed to mind. 

“Here, Foster, I'll fill out this section for you,” Keefe grinned, snatching her packet. “Let's see… _Wanted attributes for a good match:_ oh, I know what to put here. _Great hair,_ no, _the best hair, ice blue eyes, gorgeous, hilarious, name starts with a ‘K’ and ends with ‘eefe Sencen’._ ” 

“Keefe! You can't put that!” Sophie chided him, snatching away her questionnaire and amending it. 

Keefe noticed that she left everything he had written there, except for the last item on the list. That she erased with vigor. She rewarded his shenanigans with a kiss on the cheek when no one was watching. 

Or at least, they thought no one was watching.

Biana Vacker surveyed the room with narrowed eyes. Something was definitely up, and she wanted to know what.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> don't tell me he's ooc, i don't care

**Chapter Twelve**

Tam Song barged into the sitting room of Havenfield, his face bright red and his eyes narrowed. Disgust and anger were written all over his face. 

“Get away from my sister!” He snarled at the group, who all recoiled in fear. All except for Fitz, who clenched his fists and focused on restraining himself. 

“What are you doing here?” Linh asked. She was always calm, but this time with a hard edge of anger crept into her voice. 

“You can't be around these… _people._ " Tam spat. He gestured at Fitz and Dex, the latter of which was trying to disguise the fear on his face. “Do you know what they are?” 

“They are very nice people, and my good friends,” Linh replied, refusing to bend to her brother's rage. 

Tam rolled his eyes. “Those… those despicable excuses for elves are sinners! They're freaks! They shouldn't even exist!” Tam sputtered, gesturing at the two of them. 

“Don't talk about my friends like that!” Keefe shouted, jumping to his feet, furious. 

Sophie leapt up as well, not to pull him down, but to join him. “You have no right to treat them like this,” she hissed, glaring at Tam with loathing in every tense line of her body. “You are no friend of ours.” 

“What is everyone going on about?” Biana cried, annoyed and befuddled. 

Fitz sighed, then got up and walked over to his sister, kicking Tam in the shin as he passed. The other boy winced but didn't retaliate. Perhaps he knew, deep down, that he deserved it. Fitz grabbed Biana’s arm and dragged her out of the room. 

“I'll tell you, but not in front of _him,_ ” Fitz whispered in her ear. He lifted a piece of mallowmelt behind him with telekinesis and smashed it in Tam’s face. The door swung shut behind the two Vackers. 

“Will you stop?” Tam cried, angrier than ever. “Linh, come on, time to go.” 

“No,” she replied, unflinching. 

“What did you just say?” He asked. Shock flashed in his face, soon replaced with anger. 

“I'm not leaving. I'm tired of you bossing me around and treating me like a little kid, Tam. And you barge in here when we're having a fun time and call my friends horrible stuff? For a thing they can't control? You disgust me,” she snarled. “I'm staying, but it's time for you to go,” she finished. The rest of the room nodded in agreement. 

“Don't bother coming back!” Keefe called. 

Tam stormed out of the room in a temper and was gone.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sad biana  
> bad biana  
> getting very mad biana
> 
> -a poem

**Chapter Thirteen**

“Why did you hide this from me?” Biana cried, tears streaming down her face. “Did you think I wasn't trustworthy enough? That I would be mad at you? Why am I always the last one to know?” 

Fitz looked down, regret tingling in the corners of his eyes.“I'm sorry, Bi, I didn't think-” 

“No kidding,” she snorted, glaring at her brother with great contempt. 

"-that you would be… happy about it,” Fitz finished, twisting his hands anxiously. 

“Who cares if I'm happy about it?” Biana cried. “You can kiss whoever you want. I’ll admit, I wasn't expecting this, but I'm fine with. What I'm not fine with is the fact that I'm the last to know. I'm always the last.” 

“That's not true!” Fitz disagreed. 

“Oh yeah?” She challenged. “When's the last time you were out of the loop, Prince Perfect Pants?” Fitz tried to answer, but the words in his threat seemed to dry up before they reached his lips. “That's what I thought.” 

“Biana, I'm sorry,” Fitz apologized, grabbing her arm. 

“You should be,” she hissed, tugging her arm away. Then she noticed the hurt on his face. “Fitz… I need some time alone, alright?” He nodded, and she pulled out her home crystal and leaped away. 

Fitz sighed and returned to Havenfield’s sitting room. 

_Why does everything seem to be going wrong?_

“If you guys want to stay for dinner, Edaline is making custard bursts for dessert,” Sophie was saying. She smiled at Fitz as he slipped back into the room, sympathy pooling in her eyes. 

Linh mouthed _‘I'm sorry’_ as he sat back down. 

He shook his head. _‘Not your fault’_ he mouthed back, then returned to the current conversation.

“I would love to stay,” Keefe sighed, “but my dad made me promise I'd come straight home when I finished.” 

“Fitz? Dex? Linh?” Sophie asked, hopeful light in her eyes. 

Fitz shook his head. “My parents will want to know what's up with Bi… it's probably time I told them what's going on,” he sighed. 

Sophie sent him another sympathetic look. Dex and Linh declined as well, supplying their own various reasons. 

Sophie hugged them all goodbye. She held onto to Keefe just a heartbeat longer than necessary. She needed the comfort. 

His eyes held her gaze as he glittered away. 

When they had all gone, Havenfield felt empty. 

Sophie pushed her lonesomeness away and headed for dinner.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> homophobia. joy of joys. 
> 
> this one is really, really bad. i'm sorry.

**Chapter Fourteen**

“What?!” Della shrieked, turning completely invisible in her distress. “You mean to tell me,” she glowered. At least, Fitz assumed she was glowering. He couldn't actually see her. “That you kissed that daft Dizznee boy?” 

“Dex isn't daft,” Fitz muttered, eyes locked on the floor. 

Alden was pacing so much that he'd wear a groove in the floor before he organized his thoughts. “How is this even possible?” Alden muttered, running a hand through his hair for the umpteenth time. “I mean, I've heard of this happening with humans, but I didn't think elves could sink so low...” Alden caught sight of his son’s face and stopped talking. “I'm sorry, Fitz, I didn't mean-” 

“You meant it,” Fitz interjected. “I know you did.” 

Alden didn't deny it, but halted his pacing and hurried to his office. 

Fitz headed for the Leapmaster, ready to get away, when his mother appeared in his path, blocking him.

“You're not going anywhere,” Della told him. She pulled his home crystal and Imparter from his pocket before he could do more than blink. 

Fitz creased his forehead in great confusion. “What?” 

“You're on house arrest. You stay here,” Della declared. "Unless, of course, you see the error of your ways..."

“What error?” Fitz cried in consternation. "What crime am I on trial for?"

“You kissed a boy. We don't do that here. If you want to act like that, go live with the humans.” The look on Della’s face, which kept blinking in and out, told Fitz there was no point arguing. Instead, he ran, crashing into his bedroom with a furious yell and trying desperately not to cry. 

For a few seconds, he allowed himself to fail.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> biana loves her bro

**Chapter Fifteen**

Biana lay on her bed, stewing. She was so tired of all this. Of drama and anger and people always messing things up. Messing life up. 

By people, she meant Fitz. 

“Hey, Bi.” Speak of the devil. Fitz slouched into the room, eyes downcast. 

Biana ignored him, sticking her nose in the air with great contempt. 

“I'm sorry for…” Fitz paused. What was he supposed to be sorry for again? “I don't know.” 

Biana finally looked up at him, noticing the pain on his face. His eyes looked a little puffy.

“What happened?” She asked, surprised at how concerned she felt. 

“Mom put me under house arrest. Took my Imparter, too. Can't go anywhere. Can't talk to anyone except you.” 

“You could talk to Mom and Dad,” Biana suggested. A fleeting look of resentment passed over her brother's face. 

“You can,” Fitz replied. “I can't. Can't leave the house. Can't see… him.” 

“You shouldn't have to be sorry for anything,” Biana blurted. “You haven't done anything wrong.” Fitz smiled sadly. “I'm sorry. I got mad, and it's not your fault, and… ugh, I hate apologizing.” Biana was now a blubbering mess. Fitz held her, even though he shouldn't have had to. He didn't have to. But he did anyway. 

“Thanks,” Fitz whispered in her ear. 

“For the apology?” Biana asked. 

“For crying. I know you wouldn't do that unless you were actually sorry. You wouldn't want to mess up your makeup.” The siblings grinned at each other.

“This isn't fair,” Biana burst out. “I'm can't let her do this!” 

“We haven't got a choice,” Fitz answered, his grin fading. “She's guarding the Leapmaster. She'll see if I sneak up there. She won't let me leave.” 

“Not if I have anything to say about it,” Biana countered, her face grim. “I'm getting you out of this place, and you're going to go see your… go see Dex.” 

A grin spread across Fitz's face.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> keefe, queen of hair and being cute

**Chapter Sixteen**

“Do you think we should tell them?” Keefe asked, weaving Sophie’s hair into a complicated five-strand braid. She nodded absentmindedly, focusing on creating a crown out of what looked to be ice blue daisies. He rolled his eyes and pinched her on the arm.

“Ow!” She shrieked, whipping around to face him. “Why did you do that?” 

He shrugged. “You weren't listening to me.” 

“Yes, I was,” Sophie insisted.

“You weren't,” Keefe replied. “What are you so worried about, anyway?” 

“I wasn't worrying,” she said, responding a little too fast to be truthful.

“Foster, you can't lie to an Empath!” He cried, exasperated. “Now, tell me.” She reached back and patted her now-complete braid. 

“Did you…” she squinted back at him, “braid my hair?” His cheeks flushed.

“That's beside the point,” he sputtered, taking her ungloved hands in his. “Answer my question.” 

“What's the magic word?” She asked, relenting at last. 

“Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?” Keefe drew the word out like a little kid.

“Okay, okay. I'm worried about… Fitz,” Sophie sighed. Keefe’s face remained blank, but he tightened his grip on her hands. 

“Why?” She looked at him like he was insane.

“Didn't you hear? Della put him on house arrest and won't let him talk to or see Dex.” He gave her the same look she had just given him.

“Didn't you hear? Biana snuck him out and now he's staying with Linh. He's at Rimeshire now, helping Dex with a project.” Sophie looked surprised.

“Oh.” Her lips quirked up. “That's good.” She released his hands and placed the flower crown on his head, then took his hands once more. “So, tell me…” she smirked, “where did you learn to braid hair? And unless I’m very much mistaken, this is a pretty fancy braid…” 

Keefe turned bright red and refused to meet her eyes. “I learned how when I first started liking you. Thought it might… come in handy,” he mumbled.

“That's adorable!” She cooed. 

“Oh, shut up, Foster.” He paused for a second, thinking. “Hey… you never answered my original question.” 

“What question?” 

“Do you think we should tell them?” 

“Tell who?” 

“Our friends, your parents… well, your mom at least.” His face burned red. Whether with embarrassment or anger, Sophie couldn't tell. “My dad.” 

“Tell them about what?” Her ignorant innocence made him smile.

“About us,” he answered, rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand. Sophie blushed. 

“I think we should wait until we get our matchmaking scrolls.” She spoke after a minute of quiet thought, during which Keefe had resisted tickling her. “I mean, it doesn't matter to me, but my parents won't want me dating until I get my first scroll.” 

“So… are we dating?” He asked, almost dreading her reply. 

“Not yet. Right now, we're in… mutual like.” 

“Can people in mutual like kiss each other?” 

Sophie blushed a brilliant vermillion. “Sure.” 

“Phew, I was beginning to worry I'd have to wait another week for this.” 

He pressed his mouth to hers. She smiled against his lips, running a hand through his tousled blond hair. Keefe began to tickle her. 

Finally, she had to pull away, falling back into the grass and letting laughter burble from her lips. 

“Foster, you messed up my hair!” He whined. 

“Shut up, Keefe.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> match lists. not how they really work but its okay. also they're at a lake.

**Chapter Seventeen**

“I am so not ready for this.” Linh paced back and forth on the sand, twisting her hands. 

“I know, right? What if my number one is some douche? Or even worse, what if he’s ugly?” 

“Biana…” Sophie rolled her eyes. 

“Kidding!” She tossed her head, mirth sparkling in her eyes. “Ugh, they’re so late. Fitz has been at Rimeshire for _hours._ How long does it take to ‘catch up’ with your friend?”

“They’re more than friends,” Linh corrected. She lowered her voice, looking anxious. “You don’t think they’re-”

“Ew, no!” 

_“Linh.”_

“I meant kissing. Not, you know…”

“This conversation is over. Period.” Biana shook her head in disgust. 

“What conversation?” Fitz asked, glittering into view, a vanilla scroll clutched in one hand, Dex’s hand in the other. 

“We were talking about…” Biana looked around, utterly helpless.

“Books,” Sophie blurted, at the same time Linh said, “Spiders.” They both looked at Biana. 

“Linh read this really cool book about spiders and she was telling us about it.” 

Dex twisted his features in confusion. “I thought spiders were a human thing."

“They are!” Sophie assured him. “I got the book for her.” 

“Never mind that, why are we talking about books and spiders when we have match scrolls to open?” The youngest Vacker cut her off with enthusiasm. 

“Keefe isn’t here yet,” Fitz noticed. 

“Yes, I am, doofus,” Keefe said from behind Sophie. “Nice spot you picked, Foster,” he added, gazing around at the sandy beach. It adjoined an enormous sapphire lake and a dock with several small sailboats moored. 

“Thanks,” Sophie replied, feeling shy. 

“Can we please open our scrolls now?” Biana begged. After a brief hesitation, everyone nodded.

“3, 2, 1, GO!” Keefe yelled, and six red ribbons fell to the ground. After a minute full of scanning eyes, Biana couldn’t take it any longer.

“Well? Who did people get?” She burst out. 

“Should we read you the whole list?” Sophie asked, sarcasm spilling from her mouth.

“Just the first… three,” her friend replied, oblivious. “Me first!” She took a deep breath. “3… um, I’m going to skip 3. 2, Jensi Babblos. 1, Darek Alorsen. Oh, he’s that guy with the red hair, right? He’s cute.” She then turned to Sophie, who cleared her throat and began to read.

“3, Fitz Vacker. 2, Valin Tiren. Gross. And 1… Keefe Sencen.” She caught Keefe’s eye for a fraction of a second; he had moved to stand beside her. Though his mouth wasn’t smiling, his eyes were. “Your turn, Keefe.”

“3, Linh Song. 2, Luna Rellan. 1, Sophie Foster.” Sophie tried to hide her grin as Keefe folded up his list and focused his gaze on Linh. 

“3, Dexter Dizznee. 2, Alen Dorsan. 1, Fitz Vacker.” 

Then Dex. “3, Marella Redek. 2, Linh Song. 1, Biana Vacker.” 

Finally, Fitz. “3, Linh Song. 2, Sophie Foster. 1, Annaise Verale.” 

There was an awkward silence. Finally, someone spoke.

“Did you guys bring swimsuits?” Sophie asked. Everyone nodded. 

“Then what are we waiting for? Let’s jump in the lake!” Keefe yelled.

Sophie was happy to oblige.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> still at a lake. yay.

**Chapter Eighteen**

The water was cold against Biana’s bare back. She heard the splash as Sophie jumped in after her, but it was as if she was alone. Her Exilium training let her hold her breath for twenty minutes. Which meant she had plenty of time to think about her match scroll. 

It’s wasn’t that she was disappointed, exactly. Well, she was a little disappointed. Not to mention confused. 

It might be because the way Linh looked at her made Biana wish the system worked a little differently. It also might be the fact that number three on her list was Tam. 

Tam, who told her brother he was wrong for caring about a boy in a way that was different than accepted. Who would beat her bloody for the things she’d been thinking about his sister. 

Tam, with the silver-blue eyes and the lean legs. He looked good even when he was shouting at her brother. When he was telling Linh to stay away from to stay away from them all because they were disgusting and wrong. 

Her stomach curdled as she thought of all the things Fitz and Dex were facing. The words her parents had said. Tam, lashing out with his words and his fists. 

What if he told? They could face exile, or end up married to girls they’re unable to love, never to see each other again. Either way, they ended up living the rest of their lives in misery. 

Biana couldn’t face that. Not now, not ever.

_So I’ll suppress,_ she thought. _I won’t look at Linh, or smile at her. I’ll pick the nicest, cutest boy on my list, date around for a while. It’ll be easier for me because I’m not attached to any one gender. At least, I don’t think so, and I won’t think about it anymore. I’ll up my flirting game with Keefe. I’ll toss my hair and bite my lip and do anything not to let people know that I’m different._

_Because I’m not._

_I can’t be._

Biana swam back towards the surface, scrubbing her thoughts clean as she did. 

\----------------------------------

Dex didn’t want to go in the water. He didn’t want to do anything. If he couldn’t sit on the pier and hold the hand of the guy he liked, the guy who liked poking Dex in the dimples. The guy with the eyes that could turn him to dust in a single glance. If he wasn’t allowed to hold Fitz’s hand, Dex didn’t see the point in having fun. He was never going to be happy. He liked guys, and this would screw him over for the rest of his life. And of course, he had to like Fitz, the golden boy, the Vacker royalty revered by all. 

He was thinking about heading back to Rimeshire when someone shoved him off the pier into the lake. 

He rose, spluttering. “The hell?” He hadn’t meant to curse, but it felt good. Angry words were exactly what he needed. 

“Sorry,” Linh said, and she did look a bit apologetic. She also looked like she’d do it over again if given the chance. “But you need this.” Her eyes were soft as she looked down at him, treading water and glaring at her. “It’s hard, and it’s going to get harder. Trust me, I know.” 

Her eyes darted to something in the distance, then back to him. “And you don’t really feel like having a good time. But you need to. This is going to change you. Some things, though, shouldn’t change.” She gestured with a long, sweeping arm to the entirety of the lake. 

Dex gaped at her. “How… how do you know all that?” 

She smiled at him, and it was edged in broken glass. “Ask me tomorrow. Maybe then I’ll be able to answer.” 

She walked back to the beginning of the pier, then ran full speed off the end, yelling “Geronimo!” and landing with a loud splash. 

Dex watched her for a minute, wondering what she’d been through, then dove under the water. 

Linh was right. He needed to do something other than sit and stew. He needed to have a good time. He needed to hang out with the boy he liked and pretend everything would be fine, even if it wouldn’t.

\----------------------------------

The way Keefe looked at her made Sophie feel dizzy. Like she was a work of art. Like she was worth something. Like she was worth lots of things, actually. Every movement they made felt like talking in their own language. 

Shoving the other person = I like you.

Shoving the person who shoved you back = I like you too. 

Messing up Keefe’s hair = I wish we were making out right now. 

Tugging on one of Sophie’s braids = same!

For once, one of her secrets was a good thing. Not a friend on the wrong side, a spyball in her backpack, a cache hidden where it shouldn’t be found. This was something that made her happy, and she didn’t want to keep it a secret any longer. She wanted to tell everyone. She wanted to brag.

A hot stab of guilt sliced through her. Dex and Fitz had to be feeling the same way, except they couldn’t brag. They could only hide. It would be selfish of Sophie to tell them about her and Keefe, to flaunt how easy it was for them to be together. 

Sophie felt like being selfish. 

She nudged Keefe with her shoulder. They were sitting in the shallows together, watching their friends. “Hey, is it okay if I kiss you?” 

He looked at her with wide eyes. “Are you sure, Foster?”

No. “Yes.” 

“Then go right ahead.” 

Sophie tangled her fingers in his wet hair and kissed him. It was rough and painful and exactly how she wanted it to be. She didn’t know if anyone noticed, and at that moment she didn’t care. All wanted was to kiss him. 

Guilt had nothing on desire.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gay, dumb, and sleepy

**Chapter Nineteen**

He couldn’t tell what had woken him up, but late as it was, he was glad to be awake. His nightmare flashed in his mind every time he closed his eyes. 

“Fitz? Did I wake you up?” Dex was standing in the doorway, fiddling with some contraption.

“I dunno.” Fitz’s voice was thick, his eyes still blurry with exhaustion. He reached up and rubbed them, leaning against the armrest of the couch. “I was having a nightmare.”

“Oh.” Dex shifted from foot to foot. “I mean, you look like crap. Shit, sorry, I didn’t mean… shit.” The curse still sounded new in his mouth. 

“It’s fine.” Fitz rubbed his hands up and down his clammy arms. There was a tense pause.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Dex asked, leaning against the doorframe, twisting the thing in his hands.

“I don’t want to burden you…” 

Dex suppressed an eye roll. This boy. “Yeah, right. I can take it. Hit me.” 

The words tumbled out of Fitz in a jumbled mess. “The Council found out. My parents told them, and they… they took us away, and I was all alone in a cell in Exile. Just wasting away for thousands of years until I died. I never got to see another person for the rest of my life. I… I don’t want to die alone.” His eyes were damp. He didn’t bother wiping at them. It felt good to cry. “All this is my fault. I pulled you away, I told you I liked you, I kissed you. I screwed up both our lives forever. For one freaking kiss. And now you’re so angry, and it’s all… because of me.”

Dex glared at him, this pretty boy who was lying on Dex’s couch, blaming himself. “I’m not blaming you, dumbass. I’m blaming the system, and the world we live in. You’re right-this is ridiculous. We kissed, like, once, and where did it lead us? You’re sleeping on the couch at my house because you ran away from home and your horrible parents. And I’m cursing and punching things and generally acting like a douchebag. We don’t get to go on dates. We don’t get to be happy. I've spent my whole life struggling with this. I give in one time, and now I’ll most likely be miserable for the rest of my life. So yeah, I’m pissed. Aren’t you?” 

Fitz stared at him. He’d never heard Dex talk so much about something that wasn’t a device before. To Fitz, Dex had always been a background guy. Someone who shows up when you have a technical problem, like a technician, not a friend. A cute technician, sure. But still a technician. Fitz saw now that he had been wrong.

“Of course I’m angry,” he responded, and his voice was so soft in comparison to Dex’s sharp anger. “But mainly I’m sad. We can’t even try things out. We don’t even know how much we like each other. We won’t ever find out, and that makes me want to cry. I was the angry one for so long. I can’t be the angry one anymore.”

“We can find out,” Dex argued. “We can try. There are places where no one cares who we care about. Sophie’s told me…” He trailed off, and Fitz knew they were thinking about the same thing. Sophie and Keefe. The kiss. “They have it so easy.” 

“It’s not their fault.” But Fitz felt it too. The unfairness of it all.

“We should be able to find out,” Dex insisted. 

“Let’s do it, then.” Dex stared at him. “Let’s find out. Sit by me. Talk to me. Tell me about that thing in your hands. Hold my hand. Hug me. Kiss me, if you want. We’re living in the same house and we keep avoiding each other. We can’t leave, not yet, but we can test the waters.” Fitz felt a bit of the fire he’d been missing rising within. “We’ll never know unless we try.” 

“Okay,” Dex said. “Okay. I am too tired to talk to you anymore. It is three in the morning. I’m still angry. My head hurts. So right now, I’m going to go to bed.” He stared right at Fitz, who was glad it was dark, so neither of them could tell if the other is blushing. “Tomorrow, though, I would like to talk, and hold hands, and everything you just said. That good?” 

“Yeah!” Fitz tried not to sound too enthusiastic and failed. Dex flashed his dimples as he walked across the room. 

“By the way,” he added, pausing in the opposite doorway and holding up his contraption, a small pink orb. “This? Lip balm I made for Biana.” He flashed his dimples one more time and he was gone. 

He left Fitz clutching a pillow to his chest and drifting away into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> love me some fluff and pretty girls in sports bras

**Chapter Twenty**

“Sorry, Bi, can’t hang out today. Keefe and I are… well, I already have plans.” Sophie was red-faced and apologetic through the screen of Biana’s imparter. 

“It’s fine,” Biana reassured her friend, stretching her lips into a painful smile. 

“Okay, gotta go now. Bye!” Sophie blew a kiss at her, oblivious, and the screen went dark. 

Biana flopped back on her bed with a loud “oomph”. She was bored out of her mind, and all her friends were inconveniently unavailable. She couldn’t even hang out with her brother. He’d had some epiphany in the middle in the night and decided to start going on secret dates with Dex. They were spending all their time together. Sophie and Keefe were the same way. It was like now that they were a bona fide couple, they couldn’t stand to be apart from each other. She couldn’t hang out with Tam, as he was still not talking to any of them (she was surprised he hadn’t blabbed to the council yet), and she REALLY could not hang out with Linh. She needed to keep away from that dangerous girl, with her subdued manner and happy smiles and silver tipped hair. 

Of course, right as she thought this, Linh knocked on her door. 

“Come in,” Biana yelled, thinking it was her parents again. Her mom interrogating her, trying to find out Fitz’s location, or her dad, wondering yet again how this could even be possible, “scientifically speaking”. She rolled her eyes at the mere thought. 

“Hi, Biana,” came a quiet voice from the foot of her bed. 

Biana jolted upright at the sound, and there was Linh, looking so soft and put-together that Biana wanted to die. She herself was in day-old sweats (the ones Sophie had let her borrow after her first breakup. She had yet to return them) with her hair up in a messy ponytail. She hadn’t wanted to try when she woke up that morning, but this had clearly been a mistake. She smelled like crap and she wasn’t even wearing a shirt, just a decaying sports bra. 

Linh’s eyes widened as she took in Biana’s appearance. “Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize… I can leave if you want me to.” Her cheeks were flaming with embarrassment, a rare sight as she was usually so collected. 

“No, it’s fine,” Biana said, not moving to cover herself, because what was the point? Linh had already seen. “Stay.” When Linh still looked like she would bolt, Biana added, “Please. I want you to stay.” She was surprised and annoyed (at herself) to find that it was true. 

“Do you want me to grab a… a shirt or something for you?” Linh gestured towards the doors of Biana’s large walk-in closet.

Biana shook her head. “That’s okay! I’d rather just wear this for now.” She tried to force some of her usual pep into her voice, but it sounded fake to her ears. She’d never heard Linh falter before. It was so cute and polite that it made Biana want to scream. Or tear her hair out. Or both. 

“Okay…” Linh was staring at a point to the left of Biana’s head, not making eye contact or daring to glance at the other girl. Her cheeks were still pink. “Well, I don’t really want to be around Tam, and I thought you would probably be bored too, so I thought we could do something together. I brought some old magazines Sophie got in the Forbidden Cities, so we could do collages, or bake, or I could do your hair or we could go swimming or look at pets in Atlantis or anything you want, really.” 

God, this was weird. Linh was babbling! Honest-to-God babbling! Biana felt like she’d fallen into an alternate universe, one where she wore sweats and sports bras, where Linh stuttered and babbled and blushed with embarrassment, where her brother fell for a nerdy Technopath guy, where Keefe (the guy Biana should’ve had) ended up with Sophie, where Tam turned out to be a jerk…

One where boy-crazy Biana was attracted to a girl.

“That’s really nice of you, Linh.” Biana smiled, and it almost reached her eyes. Her words were sincere, at least. “Maybe we could do collages? Dex rewired my Imparter so it plays music, too, if you’d like that.” It all felt so stilted and awkward, and Biana couldn’t take it anymore. “You know what? This is weird. You’re being weird and I’m being weird and this shouldn’t be weird.” 

Linh stared at her.

“The stuff with my brother has shaken things up, but it shouldn’t change us. We’re still the same. So you’re going to come and sit on my bed with me, and I’m going to French braid your hair. We’ll make mood boards and listen to old music. We. Will. Have. A. Nice. Time.” Biana punctuated each word by grabbing her pillow and punching it. “Okay? No more weird.”

“No more weird,” Linh repeated, and a genuine smile spread across her face. “I like that.” She grabbed a hairbrush from the nightstand and sat down on the bed. Biana queued up the least romantic song she could think of (All Star by Smash Mouth) and began to brush her friend’s hair.

**************

Sophie fidgeted. She was having trouble keeping still; guilt was making her squirm. “I shouldn’t have-”

“You should have.” Keefe cut her off. “Foster, I can literally feel your guilt. And I understand. But isn’t it worth it to be able to do this?”

Sophie looked around at the trees, at the light shining through them. Then she looked at the person in front of her, who she could finally call her boyfriend. 

Shouldn’t she be happy about that?

**************

“Stop. Fidgeting,” Keefe hissed, rolling his eyes. Foster was beginning to get on his nerves. Sure, he felt guilty too, but right now he’d rather focus on how good it felt to be with her. Why didn’t she feel the same way?

She was cute when she was worried, nibbling on her lip, her nose all scrunched up. He hated the way she made him feel. Like he was swerving out of control, off the road and into her arms. One glance from those soft eyes and he was melting. This was his girlfriend. 

_Girlfriend._ He couldn’t wait to call her that. 

“I’m done,” he announced. “You can move now.” 

Sophie leaped up, an excited puppy ready for a treat. “Let me see!” She whined. God, she was adorable. Her freckles were giving him heart palpitations. 

He handed his sketchpad to her, and her mouth dropped. 

**************

Was this how he saw her? Her heart on her sleeve and her eyes full of stars. It didn’t look like her, but like who she wanted to be. Who he thought she already was. 

Sophie looked up at her boyfriend (her boyfriend!), who was staring at her, impatient and nervous, waiting for her reaction. He had charcoal smudged all over his face. He looked so earnest, and she felt so, so lucky. 

“Keefe, it’s… it’s amazing.” 

His mouth didn’t smile, but his eyes lit up. “It’s nothing.”

“It isn’t nothing. It’s something. It’s everything.” 

He kissed her, and her forehead was pressed against his, and it didn’t feel like luck this time. It felt like it was always going to happen. 

She pulled away. “You totally got charcoal on me. It’s all over your face.”

“What? Is not,” he retorted, but he licked his thumb and wiped at his face just the same.

“I can get that for you-”

“I got it.”

“You’re rubbing in the wrong place!” 

“Foster, I’m pretty sure you’re too short to reach. I got this,” Keefe smirked.

Sophie gasped. “Take it back.” 

“I will not.”

She reached under his arms and began to tickle him. 

“Stop! Stop! I fold!” He yelled. “Jesus. Never do that again.”

“Do what again?” Sophie asked, the picture of innocence as she reached up to tickle him again. 

They thought they knew how good they had it. They were wrong.

**************

Tam sat with his back against the tree, seething. He shouldn’t have to watch this. He shouldn’t have to be near this. All he’d been through, leading to this. 

_What a waste of a pretty face._


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> internalized homophobia!!!!!! what fun!!!!!
> 
> if anyone tells me he's ooc, i will scream.

**Chapter Twenty-One**

Tam didn’t understand how they could fall for each other and just tell people about it. Like it was normal. Like it was natural. Like they could ever really be a thing.

Tam knew it wasn’t normal, wasn’t natural. He’d heard the speech enough times that he could recite it from memory.

“Sometimes, when a boy or girl is going through a difficult time in their life, they look for affection in the wrong places. It’s fine to look at someone of the same gender and view them as attractive, but you must never, ever act on those thoughts. The world has enough sin.” 

When Tam was feeling weak, he repeated it to himself. It strengthened his resolve and his belief that if he waited long enough and tried hard enough, his parents would take him back. 

Linh was weak; this he could clearly see. Smiling at Biana, blushing, fiddling with the tips of her hair. 

_It’s so wrong,_ he thought. _Doesn’t she want to go home, and live with our parents again? Doesn’t she want a family, a future? Doesn’t she want something more than being an outcast?_

_And yet, if it’s so wrong, why does she seem so happy?_

Tam shook his head, wiping the thought from his mind. _You can’t think things like that. If you want to go home, you have to be normal._

He looked down at his match list and faked a smile, even though there was no one around to see. One of these girls would make him happy, he was sure of it. There had to be a girl, right? The guy gets the girl. 

_That’s just how it works._

**********

_“Man and woman are meant to be together. To create children. To further the elven race. I’ve told you this many times before, but you don’t seem to understand. And until you do, I can’t have either of you in my house.”_

_“Dad, no, please… I was just messing around… Please, I’ll stop, just don’t make us leave, please-please don’t make me leave…” Hot tears rolled down his cheeks. “Mom?” He looked at their mother, and even though tears were welling in her eyes she raised a steady hand and pointed at the door._

_“When you find peace, when you find someone who sets you straight… you may return home,” she said. Her voice was steady with righteousness._

_“I will, Mom, I promise… I’ll find my way. I’ll come back to you. I will!” His voice was shaking._

_“I hope so…” The only time he had ever heard her sound weak._

_The door slammed shut behind them._

**********

Her husband shook his head. “Not until we know where they are.”

“Alden…”

“I don’t want this to be an obstruction in our son’s future. We find them, banish Dexter, and make Fitz forget any of this ever happened. No one else needs to know.”

“Biana, and his friends?” Della asked.

“We can wipe them too; it won’t be hard.”

“Dexter’s family?” She pressed.

“Easily threatened into silence by the Council. They won’t want to lose another child. As soon as we know where they are, everything will fall into place.” He smiled, ignoring the ping of guilt. “We can be happy again.”

“How will we find out? Did you check Rimeshire yet?” Della still looked worried.

Alden’s grin widened. “I have a better plan.” He held up a sparkly hair clip. “Trust me, my love.” 

_No reason to worry..._


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> time to party

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Sophie stared at Linh, who was staring at Biana, who was way too dolled up and very much not looking back at Linh, instead focusing her eyes on Keefe. Linh glanced away, and Biana turned to look at Linh. Both of their cheeks were pink.

Sophie rolled her eyes. She knew she had a reputation for being oblivious, but really. Couldn’t everyone see the way Biana and Linh were looking at each other? Sophie wanted to lock the two girls in Dex’s bedroom until they kissed. 

She’d had crushes on both of them at one point, but luckily she’d moved on by now, because they were both head-over-heels for each other. 

_Not that they would ever admit it,_ Sophie thought. Rather than continuing to watch them eyefuck, her eyes drifted back to the elephant in the room. 

Tam. 

“Who invited _him_?” Keefe had asked, not even trying to be polite, when Tam stumbled into the room, bleary-eyed and glaring. 

“I did,” Fitz said. Everyone had stared. Fitz shoved his hands in his pockets. “People deserve a second chance,” he mumbled. 

Tam had taken a seat in the corner of the room, and they all went back to talking and eating. 

At first, Sophie thought that Fitz had gone insane. Inviting Tam into Dex’s house? After he’d said those horrible things? After he’d hit Dex? 

And then she watched. She watched Dex’s face tighten as he watched Tam. She watched Fitz slip his hand into Dex’s. She watched as Dex’s cheeks burned, as his face relaxed, as he flashed his dimples at Fitz. She saw how much happier they both looked, and the ease with which they talked. And she began to think that maybe Fitz wasn’t so crazy after all. 

Keefe was the crazy one. 

“Why do you keep glaring at us?” Keefe yelled at Tam, who had indeed been glaring at Keefe and Sophie. The room fell silent. Dex and Fitz looked up at him, both wincing. “Shouldn’t you like the only…” Keefe hesitated, then continued. “Only straight people in the room?” 

Sophie raised her eyebrows at the last bit but didn’t comment.

Tam looked confused. “I don’t know what ‘straight’ means, and I wasn’t staring at you and your _girlfriend_ ,” he sneered.

_He totally was._ Sophie rolled her eyes.

“I was staring,” Tam continued, “at my sister. My weakling sister.” 

Linh sat up straight, her eyes bright with anger. 

“I see you looking at her,” Tam snorted. “Your pretty princess. I see the way you look at each other.” His voice dripped with disdain.

Biana looked like she might cry. “I don’t-”

She was cut off by Tam scoffing loudly. 

_Jesus freaking Christ,_ Sophie thought. _Can we please just hang out once without some homophobic drama? I’m so done._

Linh seemed to be thinking the same thing. “No,” she said, rising to her feet. “No,” she repeated, and her voice was tight with anger. “You don’t get to do this over and over again. Fitz was nice enough to give you a second chance, and you’re throwing it in his face. Why are you even here, Tam? To tell me I’m weak, over and over again? I’ve heard it enough times that I don’t believe it anymore. You’re the weak one, for filling your heart with hate.” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared. 

Everyone stared in awe, reminded of how powerful Linh was.

“I…” Tam looked like he was choking. To their shock, he put his head in his hands and began to cry. “It’s just so hard. I don’t know what to do. I just want to go home.” He took in a long, gasping breath and repeated himself. “I just want to go home.” 

Linh sank onto the couch next to Biana, unable to look at her brother. She buried her face in Biana’s shoulder, and Biana, shocked, cautiously began to stroke Linh’s hair. 

It was Fitz who got up and wrapped an arm around Tam’s shoulders. He didn’t tell the other boy to stop crying. He told Tam to let it all out. He didn’t talk after that. He didn’t need to. It was enough that he was there. 

Dex couldn’t join them. He wasn’t ready yet. But he could watch, and he couldn’t smile quite yet, but he flashed Fitz a discreet (not really) thumbs up. 

“Why did you raise your eyebrows when I called us straight people? That’s the right word, isn’t it?” Keefe nudged her, pulling her eyes away from the sobbing boy.

Sophie rolled her eyes yet again. _Who’s oblivious now?_ “Keefe, I’m pretty sure none of us are straight, the two of us included.” 

“Wait, what?” 

“Time to go,” she grinned. “We can discuss this later."

**********

Della felt her eyes widen. 

“Found them.” 

Alden smiled, ignoring his gut feeling that _this isn’t right, Alden, what do you think you’re doing?_

“Time to fix this mess.” 

_Because it’s a mess… right?_


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> linhiana time!

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

Try as she might, Linh wasn’t feeling particularly calm. She wanted to punch something. She wanted to let wave after wave crash over her. She wanted to cry until she ran out of tears.

No, Linh wasn’t feeling calm. Linh was feeling stupid and self-hateful and like she wanted to freaking die. 

**********

It had killed Biana to say it, but she had to. She had to! God, she couldn’t even convince herself. 

She hadn’t wanted to. She’d wanted to fist pump and victory dance and do it all over again, maybe with the addition of chapstick. 

But she wasn’t ready. She didn’t think she’d ever be ready, and especially not right then.

**********

They were lying on the dirty ground. Their knees were scraped and their hair was full of sticks and leaves. They were both glowing with happiness.

They’d decided to race through the trees, because why not? Everyone else was coupled off yet again (with the exception of Tam), and Biana was full of energy after being pent up indoors all day, interrogated by her parents. She’d said she had to go to the bathroom, snuck out the window, and met up with Linh at the top of the hill. 

They ran down it, getting banged up as they crashed through the trees. They were toe to toe until the very end, when Linh caught Biana’s eye and _winked_. Biana was so flustered that she tripped over her own feet, and Linh won.

They collapsed in exhaustion, not caring about the grime. Both their chests were heaving, faces red, sweaty hair clinging to their foreheads. They looked at each other. Their heads were so close, and something just… clicked. 

And they were kissing. They were kissing and it was _wonderful,_ Biana thought. _So different from kissing a boy. So much softer. So much..._

That’s when she realized what was happening.

And Biana was scrambling away, as fast as she could. Hurt filled Linh’s eyes, but Biana didn’t stop until she was a safe distance. 

“I’m so sorry, Biana.” Linh’s lip was trembling. “I thought-”

“You thought wrong.” Biana cut her off sharply. “I’m not one of _those people_.” She felt like she might throw up.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” Linh tried to say, but Biana kept talking over her.

“Just because my brother is… just because my brother likes another guy doesn’t mean I like you.” She was yelling now. “I’m not like that, okay? I’m not like him. I like boys. Just boys, only boys, because you can only pick one, and I pick the one that won’t destroy my whole life, which is exactly what this will do. And I can’t…” Her voice dropped, and as she trailed away, she realized her face was wet with tears. She wrapped her arms around herself and continued. “If I’m around you any longer, I’ll do something I regret.” 

Linh thought Biana might slap her. It felt like she already had. “I’ll go,” she whispered. Then, louder, “I’ll leave you alone. You don’t have to worry about me bothering you again. I’ll stay away. Okay?” 

Biana hesitated. Linh began walking back towards the house.

“Linh?” 

She paused, waiting.

But Biana didn’t say anything else. And Linh kept walking.

If Linh had stayed any longer, Biana would’ve kissed her again.

**********

“Don’t be stupid.” Dex was still laughing as he picked up his Imparter. Biana’s teary face filled the screen.

“Dex, you have to leave.”

“What?” Shock hadn’t even registered on his face yet. He looked happy and relaxed, his face flushed. 

Biana felt like she might throw up. “You and Fitz have to get out of there. You’re not wearing your registry pendants, right?”

Dex shook his head. 

“Then leave. Run. Light leap somewhere you won’t be found. I was eavesdropping on my parents, and…” Biana took a deep breath. “The Council is coming. They’re going to wipe Fitz, banish you…” Tears were still streaking down her face.

Dex’s face went hard, sharp angles and barely hidden rage. “I have to go.”

“Dex-”

He ended the call. 

“Is something wrong?” Fitz asked, concern written on his face. 

“We need to go. Now.”


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ooh, drama

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

_“Biana?” Della was standing in the doorway of her daughter’s bedroom, blinking in and out of sight. She smoothed the front of her pale yellow gown. “Long time, no see.” She smiled sadly._

_Biana refused to feel sorry for her. “You saw me yesterday, Mom.” She rolled her eyes._

_“Are you doing anything fun today?”_

_Another eyeroll. “You’re not getting it out of me that easily.”_

_“I’m not talking about F-I just wanted to talk to you.” Della looked hopeful._

_Biana wouldn’t let herself feel guilty. “You won’t even say his name,” she spat._

_Her mother’s face crumpled. “I just want everything to be like it was,” she murmured. “I just want to braid your hair, and gossip, and send you off to your friends without worrying. I want that just for now. Can we do that please?”_

_Biana looked at her mother’s teary eyes, her sunken cheeks, the hollows beneath her eyes. Biana took in all this weakness, and in a weakness of her own, said “Yes.”_

**********

_“I like your hair clip, Biana!” Linh said with unwarranted enthusiasm._

_“Thanks! My mom gave it to me.” Biana smiled._

**********

Sophie was rubbing slow circles on Biana’s back as the other girl cried. Sophie’s eyes were red-rimmed as well, but she was managing to hold it together. Biana, not so much.

“It’s all my fault,” Biana sobbed. She was crying so hard she could barely breathe, and her voice was heavy with tears. “I let… I let her… the hair clip. It’s m-my fault.” 

Linh sat on the bed with Biana and Sophie, a good foot away from the other girls. “You can’t keep blaming yourself.” Her voice cut through the air. 

Biana lifted her head from her hands, shocked. She and Linh hadn’t spoken to each other since yesterday. When they kissed. When Biana threw Linh away like trash. When she ran to her room in silent tears and overheard her parents’ plans. When she’d called her all her friends, even Tam, telling them to get out while they still could. When she’d run after Linh and taken them both to Sophie’s. When they’d jumped off a cliff and teleported to the Forbidden Cities, registry pendants long gone. 

They still hadn’t heard from Dex, Fitz, Tam, or Keefe. 

“If you blame yourself, you’ll just make everything harder.” 

Biana laughed, and it hurt more than crying ever had. “How would you know? You’ve never fucked up this badly.”

Linh shook her head. “Maybe not, but I’ve blamed myself for bad things happening, things that weren’t my fault.”

“Like what?” Biana scoffed, tired of being nice. She’d been nice before, and look where that had led her? Sniveling and pathetic on a hotel bed, wondering if she’d doomed everyone she loved to a fate worse than death. 

“My parents didn’t kick me out for being a twin, or lack of control, or any of that.” Linh closed her eyes and forged ahead, silver tear tracks visible on her cheeks.

“They kicked me out because I like girls.”


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :) the chapter that makes everyone hate me :)

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

“Oh, no.” Fitz’s face sagged. “They’ve found us, haven’t they?” His eyes were growing wet. 

Dex pressed his lips together in a firm line and nodded. “I’m sorry. There’s no time to pack. We just need to leave.”

Fitz shook his head. “I can’t.” 

“I don’t think you understand. They’re going to wipe your memory, banish me. If you stay, we’ll never see each other again.”

“I know.” Fitz looked like he had the weight of the world pressing down upon his chest. “But I can’t leave my sister, my parents… maybe it’s better this way.” 

Now Dex was the one crying. “It’s better that you don’t remember me? Remember any of this? It’s better that you live in miserable silence until the end of eternity? That’s really the life you want for yourself?” His cheeks were wet with tears. 

“I’m so sorry, Dex.” 

“I won’t let you stay. I can’t just leave you here!” He was panicking, fear and worry all over his face.

“You have to,” Fitz said, and Jesus Christ, they were both crying. He didn’t think he’d ever been so miserable, but he couldn’t just… he couldn’t. He wasn’t ready. He didn’t think he’d ever be ready, and especially not right then. “I’m not giving you a choice.”

Dex’s face was red, and he was still crying. He’d never felt so pathetic in his life. “I can’t go without you.” 

“And I can’t go with you.” Fitz’s eyes were soft, but his resolve was firm. 

“Biana can take care of herself, and your parents…” Dex’s face twisted. “They’ll never want you as long as you want me.”

“If we both leave, they’ll never stop looking,” Fitz says. “But if they get the Vacker boy, the golden boy… if they can make me better, they’ll give up on you. And I can be happy knowing that you’re safe.”

Dex’s lips were salty, and his arms were too tight as he wrapped them around Fitz’s waist. It was their first real kiss, one that was something more than a manifestation of buried lust. This kiss meant something. 

_Perfect timing,_ Dex thought. _This becomes something real right before I lose him._

They made it last as long as they could, but when the banging on the door began, Fitz pulled away. 

“Leave,” he said. 

“I can’t...” 

“Leave,” Fitz repeated with more force in his voice. “If you don’t, I’ll never forgive myself.”

The banging was growing louder. 

Dex lifted the crystal Sophie had given him, the one that led to the Forbidden Cities. It cast a beam of light. 

He locked eyes with Fitz, and he knew this was his last chance. If he didn’t say it now, he’d regret it for the rest of his life. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

Dex stepped into the light, and the door burst open.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a lil fluff in a time of pain

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

Sophie and Linh were sitting on the ground with their backs to the wall, being as quiet as possible so as not to wake Biana. 

“Linh?” Sophie whispered. 

“Yeah?” Linh didn’t look at her. She kept her eyes on Biana, making sure she was safe, making sure she was okay. 

“I don’t think the boys are coming.” Sadness leaked out of her closed eyes. She tilted her head back against the wall.

“Me neither.” 

“Everything is different now.” She rolled her head back and forth. “Like… you and Biana?”

“I don’t think now is the time for girl talk.” Linh rubbed her eyes, tired beyond words.

“I need to feel normal again.” A pause. “Please, talk to me.” 

“Biana doesn’t like me like that,” Linh sighed. 

“But you like her?” Silence was all the confirmation Sophie needed. “How do you know she doesn’t like you?” 

“I kissed her, and she said… she didn’t take it well.” Linh sounded sad in a way that made Sophie’s heart ache, remembering sitting under Calla’s tree not too long ago. So much had happened in such a short amount of time. “She said I shouldn’t assume, that she’s not like her brother, that she can only pick one, and she chooses the one that won’t… won’t ruin her life.”

“Aww, sweetie,” Sophie cooed, new understanding in her voice. She opened her eyes and caught Linh wiping at her own. She wrapped the other girl in a hug, letting her rest. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.” 

“It’s fine.” Linh’s voice was muffled against Sophie’s shoulder. 

“Her face when you said ‘I like girls’ made me think… just, the way she looks at you… but   
I guess I was wrong,” Sophie mumbled. After a minute she added, “Things don’t always have to be fine, you know. You’re allowed to talk about it.” 

“Can I?”

“Whenever you need me, I’m here,” Sophie said. “No matter what.”

“Thank you,” Linh sniffled. “That’s all I need.”

“Can I give you some advice?” Sophie asked. 

“Yes please.”

“Talk to her again. Even if you just stay friends, even if all it does is give you closure, please talk to her. Talking always helps.” 

“Not always.” 

“It’ll help,” Sophie assured her. “Plus, all the sexual tension is killing me,” she smirked. 

“Sophie!” Linh whisper-shrieked, giggling. “Inappropriate!”

“You still love me.”

“I do. You’re a good friend.” Her words were beginning to slur. Her eyes fell closed, and she was in dreamland, her head on Sophie’s shoulder.

_Mission accomplished,_ Sophie thought. Linh had fallen asleep with a smile on her face.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a n g s t

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

“I didn’t do anything.” Tam rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

Keefe was so angry he could barely speak. “You told… the Council… Dex and Fitz… asshole!” He punched the wall of Tam and Linh’s apartment, empty but for the two of them. 

“Oh, so they got caught?” Tam was cool and collected, a far cry from his tears last time they’d seen each other. “About time. You know, I wasn’t the one that told the Council about them, but I wish I was. I’d like to be the reason they get what they deserve.”

Keefe was quiet for a long minute. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet but just as angry. “Why? Why do you hate them so much?”

“Because it’s _wrong._ Can’t you see that?” The calm in his voice was more unsettling than rage. “Man and woman are meant to be together. To create, to live, to love. Man and man, woman and woman… that isn’t love. It’s perversion, and it makes me sick.” All completely monotone. 

“You can’t believe that.” 

“You can’t not.” It sounded like a question. “How can you not believe it? Didn’t your parents teach you anything?”

“No, and for once I’m glad.” Keefe glared. “I thought my parents screwed me over, but you… you’re incapable of caring.”

“I care more than you know,” Tam replied in a low voice, glaring back. 

“I hate you.”

**********

_I’m alone, in a place I’ve never been. I have no money, I don’t speak the language very well, and I just left the boy I love in the only home I’ve ever known, about to be brainwashed,_ Dex thought. _He said he loves me too. I left behind someone who loves me, who I love back. I left him, and he’s going to forget me._

_I don’t have my Imparter. I don’t have a pathfinder of my own. I don’t have any way to communicate with anyone._

_I’m on my own._

Shallow breaths. His chest moved up and down, up and down, getting faster every second. Thoughts whirled in his mind like a nightmare carousel. 

He sat down on a bench and put his head between his knees. His breaths came slowed and his thoughts wound down until he caught on a single spinning thread. 

_I love him and I left him. He loves me and I left him. They’re going to make him forget me._

_Soon he won’t love me anymore._


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> whoops my hand slipped...
> 
> my beta reader is an actual genius. shoutout to bri ily. you can thank her for this particular strain of pain.

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

“Please.” Fitz was tied to a chair, snot and tears smeared on his face. “Don’t do this.” 

“It’s for the best,” Della soothed. She kneeled in front of him and smoothed sweaty strands of hair back from his forehead. Her eyes were wet. “I’m doing what’s best for you.”

“You’re breaking me.” Tears falling faster and harder. 

“You’re already broken.” Brushing tears away with her thumb. Picking up a corner of her dress and using it to clean his face. “I’m fixing you.” 

_What if I don’t need to be fixed?_

“Our Washer is almost ready, Della.” Councillor Emery appeared, a grin plastered on his face. He kept his eyes on Della as she rose to her feet. 

_He won’t even look at me._

“Oh thank you, Emery.” Della smiled graciously and placed a hand on his arm. “I’m so glad we could get this taken care of.”

“Me too,” he agreed. “We’ve had instances like this before, but never anything so… blatant.”

“Well, my children are used to being in the spotlight!” A false laugh, too high to be natural. 

“Any sign of the other boy?”

All pretenses dropped as Della glared at the Councillor. “Not in front of him,” she hissed through her teeth. 

“Right,” Emery nodded. “Best to forget what we can never have.”

_But I had him. We had each other._

“Exactly.” Della smoothed the front of her skirt, fixing another brilliant smile upon her face. “Let’s proceed, Councillor.”

“As you wish.” He nodded and stepped out of the room, heading to get the Washer. 

“Mom, please,” Fitz begged. Sobbing, thinking of his boy, of how careless he’d been. 

“Things are better this way,” she murmured, now unable to meet his eyes. “You’re back with the people that really love you, not children whose misguided upbringing has clearly damaged them beyond repair.” Eyes flashing to his, then away again. “Soon everything will be perfect again.”

“You can wipe my memories,” Fitz spat, tears still wet on his red face. “You can rearrange my brain. You can throw my thoughts in a blender and fuck me up.”

“Language!” Della gasped.

Fitz ignored her. “But… but…” He’d had a point, and yet now, he couldn’t think of anything to say. He let his head fall forward and began to cry in earnest. 

Della stood right in front of him and, grabbing his chin, lifting it until they were eye level. “What you had with him,” she growled, her voice lower and angrier than he’d ever heard it, leaning in until they were nose to nose. “That isn’t love. It’s nothing but a mistake.”

_“Learn from your mistakes, Fitz, for they make you stronger.”_

_What have I learned?_

The Washer entered the entered the room, and Della stepped back as they placed their hands on Fitz’s forehead. He had time for one last thought before they entered his mind. 

_Never fall in love._

Fitz held Dex’s face in his mind for as long as he could. He knew he would never see it again.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pain begins from a young age

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

_“Bi?” Fitz called. “Bi-Bi! Where are you?” He was six, she was three, and he wanted to play. The friend Mommy and Daddy had sent wasn’t very nice, so he was running away to be with his baby sister._

_“Fitzy!” Biana crashed into him. They fell to the floor of her bedroom, giggling. “Where’d you go?”_

_“Mommy brought a friend, but I don’t like her,” Fitz told his sister, who was wearing the same dress as their mother. “Her name is Stina, and she’s not my friend.”_

_“Play with me!” Biana squealed, planting kisses all over her brother’s face. “You can be a princess, and I’ll save you. You can wear a pretty dress!”_

_“Okay!”_

_Fitz threw himself into her closet and grabbed his favorite dress. It was yellow, and dotted with sparkly rhinestones. He wriggled out of his itchy boy clothes and into his princess outfit._

_“Pretty.” Biana patted his cheek with her sticky little hands. “Go to the tower, princess!”_

_He scrambled up the stairs of the playcastle until he reached the tower._

_“Help!” He yelled. “I’m a princess, and I need someone to save me from the dragon!” He glared down at the stuffed dragon, lying on the ground in front of the tower. “If you save me, I’ll give you a big kiss!” He made exaggerated smooching noises._

_“Don’t worry, princess!” Biana charged out of the closet. “I’ll save you!” She tripped over her skirt and tumbled to the ground, giggling. “I’m Princess Biana!” She stumbled to her feet, only to trip again and fall flat on her face. “I’m coming!”_

_“Hurry, Princess!” Fitz squealed. “The dragon is going to eat me!”_

_Biana got up again and yanked on the edge of her skirt until it ripped away. Now wearing only the bodice and her underwear, she continued freely. “I’m coming, Fitzy!”_

_“Princess Fitzy,” he corrected, fluffing out his skirt._

_“What are you two doing?”_

_“Daddy!” Biana shrieked, rushing over and leaping into her father’s outstretched arms. “You’re back!”_

_“Biana, sweetie, what are you wearing?” He looked up at his son, who was leaning out the tower window, staring. Alden’s face tightened, and he placed his daughter gently on the floor. “Fitzroy, come down from there.”_

_Fitz walked down the stairs, taking care not to step on his dress. He came to stand in front of his father. “Do you like my dress, Daddy?” His eyes were wide and hopeful._

_Alden crouched down so that he and Fitz were eye level. “Why are you wearing that, Fitzroy?”_

_“Cause it’s pretty.” Fitz twirled around, stopping to smile at his dad. “I’m a princess, and Biana is saving me.”_

_“Fitz, you need to take the dress off.”_

_Fitz blinked at him. “Why?” He didn’t understand. Did Daddy not like his dress? Did he think it wasn’t pretty? “It’s pretty,” he repeated._

_“Yes, it’s very pretty,” Alden agreed, kneeling in front of his son. “But you need to take it off.”_

_“No,” Fitz shook his head. “I don’t wanna.”_

_“Alden? Is everything okay?” Della appeared in the doorway, her forehead wrinkled in a frown. The frown deepened as her eyes fell on Fitz._

_“He won’t take it off,” Alden explained._

_“Oh, Fitz, baby.” Della sat next to her husband and took Fitz’s hands in hers. “Honey, you need to take off the dress.”_

_“Momma, why?” Tears ran down his red cheeks. “It’s my favorite.”_

_“I know, sweetheart, but you can’t wear it.”_

_Fitz began to wail. No one was explaining and he didn’t understand what was going on. He wanted to play Princess, and twirl, and hug Daddy, but Daddy was mad and he didn’t know why._

_“Don’t cry, Fitz.” His mother wiped his tears away. “Boys don’t cry.” She cupped his face in her hand and lifted it until his eyes met hers. “And boys don’t wear dresses. Do you understand?”_

**********

He groaned as the bright light fell across his pillow. 

“Fitz!” His mother jumped to her feet. “How are you feeling?”

“What happened?” He mumbled, throwing an arm over his eyes. 

“Don’t you remember?” She asked, ever innocent. 

He wrinkled his forehead in confusion. “No…” He removed his arm and looked at her. “I don’t remember anything.” 

A smile spread across Della’s face. 

“I don’t remember anything at all.”


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> all's fair in love and utter agony

**Chapter Thirty**

It was misty out. Droplets of water clung to Dex’s face, washing away the tear tracks carved across his face. 

_I left him._

Flashes of memories kept replaying in his mind. Resting his head on Fitz’s lap. Bursting into laughter in the dead of night. Holding hands. Juline pulling him to the side and saying, “baby, as long as he treats you well, like him all you want.” Biana threatening bodily harm if Dex ever hurt Fitz. Kissing. Saying “I love you” for the first and last time.

_This is all my fault._

Dex could feel himself sinking into the grief. It was like slowly getting into an icy bath, letting the truth wash over him again and again, waiting for the numbness to take over. Waiting for it to not feel real anymore.

His breathing was getting faster, the world around him starting to spin. Gray fuzz crept into the corners of his vision and he looked down at his hands, his unbearable hands that had touched Fitz only hours before. 

They had wiped Fitz by now, Dex was sure. Turned him into a pretty boy with an empty mind who didn’t remember his sister, his best friends, his… 

Dex felt like everything was slowing down to a glacial speed. Was someone talking? His eyes felt weighed down by all he’d done. 

_“Leave. If you don’t, I’ll never forgive myself.”_

_How can I ever forgive you for telling me to leave?_

Dex wrapped his fingers around the corner of the bench he sat on, gripping as tight as he could, feeling his skin break. 

“Dex? Is that you?”

He drew his knees up to his chest and buried his face in them, sparks dancing in front of his empty eyes.

“Oh my God. Oh my God. We have to-”

_“We’ll never know unless we try.”_

“Where’s Fitz?”

“He-what? No. No, Fitz has to be around here somewhere. Fitz? Fitz!”

“Bi, I don’t think-”

“Dex, can you hear me? Dex!”

_“I want to protect you.”_

“Dex, come on. Snap out of it and tell us where Fitz is.”

“I don’t think he knows we’re here…” Someone began shaking his shoulders. “I doubt he can hear us at all.”

**********

_“Dex?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_They were lying in a field, gazing up at the starry sky, shoulders almost touching._

_“What do you think is going to happen to us?” Fitz asked. “Like, with…”_

_“I know what you mean,” Dex replied. He fell silent._

_“Dex?” Fitz prompted after several minutes with no response._

_“I have no idea,” Dex whispered. “I guess we’ll just have to find out.” He’d turned to rest on his side and his nose was brushing against Fitz’s cheek._

_Slowly, carefully, Fitz turned until their noses were almost touching. He could feel Dex’s warm breath on his cheeks._

_“I think it’s worth it.”_

_“I think so too.”_

_And then they were kissing, and they weren’t thinking about the future anymore._

**********

“We’re going to find Fitz, right?” Biana looked the youngest she had in years, her teal eyes glistening and her lip trembling. “I mean, they probably just got split up or something. Right?”

“Oh, Biana…” Sophie rubbed her tired eyes, trying not to fall apart. “I don’t think so.” 

Biana began to sob.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> beauty is pain, which is why biana's life sucks so much.

**Chapter Thirty-One**

Sophie stepped away from Dex, tangling her hands through her hair as she tried to make sense of it all. 

“His mind isn’t broken,” she said after a beat, wrapping a lock of hair around and around her finger as she spoke. “He’s not lost, either; I can see his dreams. I just can’t seem to find a way to pull him back to consciousness.” 

“What about Fitz?” Biana asked. 

Sophie bit her lip and looked at the floor. 

“Sophie…” A tear trickled down Linh’s cheek.

“Just tell us,” Biana snapped. There’s no venom in it, only pain. “It can’t be worse than what I’ve imagined.” 

Sophie felt herself cracking into a million pieces. “We… we don’t know for sure, but Dex thinks that they… they wiped his mind.”

Biana swayed on her feet. “What?” 

“Fitz stayed behind. He forced Dex to leave without him, because he knew they’d never stop searching for the… for the golden Vacker boy. Della already lost Alvar, and she’s… she’s determined not to lose Fitz too.” Sophie covered her face with her hands. She couldn’t bear to look at their shocked faces, to have the words she spoke be the reason for their tears. “It’s all my fault. I told them I had a plan, that I could help them, but I didn’t do anything at all.” Tears slipped between her fingers. “It’s all my fault.” 

“So he doesn’t know who I am anymore,” Biana murmured. Her face was as blank as the wall she faced. “Does he?”

“I don’t know.” Sophie’s breathing was coming in fast, short gasps. “I don’t know what they kept and what they took away, but Dex… He and Fitz said ‘I love you’. Right before Dex left. And he… he’s fucked up. He’s really fucked up, and it’s all… it’s all my fault.”

Biana punched the wall. Her beautiful face was contorted with rage, her teal eyes clouded with tears. She began to cry in earnest, thick, gasping sobs pouring from her as she collapsed onto the bed next to Dex’s sleeping form, clutching her bleeding knuckles. 

Sophie and Linh watched, each girl her own island of grief, close to land but never quite touching. Sophie’s arms were loosely wrapped around her stomach, and tears continued to course down her cheeks. Linh watched Biana, reaching out a hand and then letting it drop.

“It’s not your fault, Sophie,” Linh whispered, stroking the other girl’s hair. 

“Linh’s right,” Biana said in a low voice. The other girls looked up, startled at the sound of her voice. “It’s not Sophie’s fault.” Her gaze was harder than diamonds as she turned to glare at the boy lying on the bed next to her. “It’s his.” 

Sophie shook her head, ignoring Linh’s shocked gasp. “Biana, I’ve seen his memory of what happened. He didn’t do anything wrong.” 

“How can I believe anything you say?” Biana glowered at her best friend. “You said you had a plan to help my brother, and yet look where we are now.”

Sophie’s eyes filled to the brim with fresh tears, and Linh sent Biana a look. “If the mind of the most powerful Telepath in the elven world breaks, no one will be able to recover your brother’s memories. That’s a guarantee.” 

Biana looked down at her bloody hand, remorse already washing over her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.” 

“It’s okay,” Sophie whispered. “I’m going to... I’ll be right back.” She slipped out of the room without a word, the only sign she’d ever been there a bitter cloud of guilt.

Linh sank onto the bed next to Biana, close but never touching. The same game she’d always played without ever having a choice in the matter. 

“I shouldn’t have said that.” Biana wiped her nose on the back of her hand, not bothering to wipe her tears away. “I didn’t mean it. I always say the wrong thing, and she keeps forgiving me, but I just… it’s not going to last forever.” She turned to gaze at Linh, her lips slightly parted, her cheeks still wet with tears. 

“I’ll always forgive you,” Linh whispered. Her fingers twitched with wanting, but Linh stayed perfectly still. 

Biana’s hand was inches from Linh’s. “I didn’t mean it. Any of it. I was so afraid.” In that moment, Linh saw her for what she truly was: small, and frail, and broken. “I’m still so, so afraid.”

“I forgive you,” Linh breathed. 

Biana reached forward, cupping Linh’s face in the palm of her unbroken hand. “I don’t want to hurt you.” 

“I think it’s a little late for that,” Linh laughed softly. 

Biana leaned forward ever so slightly, until their lips brushed.

“You’ve already hurt me.” Linh reached up and brushed Biana’s hair back, tracing a gentle finger over the spiderweb of scars mapped across Biana’s face. “You’re hurting me right now.”

“I’m not trying to.” Biana let her eyes slip downwards, gazing at Linh’s hand on the bed, inches from her own.

“That’s what hurts so much.” 

Their eyes met for a single moment, and Biana let herself memorize it, turn it over and over in her mind until it was crystallized in amber, down to the very last detail.

And then her hand was tangled in Linh’s hair and her legs were wrapped around Linh’s waist and Linh was pressing tiny dots of fire up her neck, their faces getting closer and closer with every microscopic kiss. 

“I guess I won’t make you wait any longer,” Linh breathed.

Biana kept her eyes open as their lips finally met.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the reappearance of our favorite bois

**Chapter Thirty-Two**

Dex opened his eyes to find a pair of glittering teal eyes hovering over him. 

“Fitz?” Dex reached his hand up and touched the face above him gently, making sure it was real. “I can't believe it. I thought… I thought I lost you.” Happy tears welled in his eyes.

“What?” 

The second he heard the voice, he knew something was wrong. It was too high, too scratchy, too… Dex knew Fitz had never sounded so broken in his life. 

“I'm not… I'm not who you think I am.” Biana's voice was thick with sadness. 

“I know.” Dex covered his face with his hands. “I remember.” 

“I'm sorry,” Biana whispered. “I didn't mean to…”

“It’s fine.” Dex turned away. He couldn’t bear to look at her, at all the lines of where Fitz used to be. 

**********

“Hey, Fitz!” Keefe called, throwing an arm around his best friend’s shoulders and ruffling Fitz’s dark hair. “Where’ve you been?”

Fitz shrugged. “Got a concussion playing bramble. Mom wanted me to stay home and rest for a while, so I’ve been MIA. What’d I miss? Any big tests or anything?” 

Keefe groaned. “First day back and all you want to know about is school. Typical Fitzy.” 

“Fitzy?” Fitz raised his eyebrows at the nickname. “That’s new.”

“While you were gone, he decided we all need nicknames.” Tam slunk out of the shadows to walk beside the two boys. He elbowed Keefe in the side, ignoring the taller boy’s yelps. 

“You know Fitz is already a nickname, right?” Fitz asked, extricating himself from Keefe’s arm. 

“Yeah, a boring one.” Keefe rolled his eyes, as though Fitz should already have known. “Anyways, I’m Keefie, you’re Fitzy, and Mr. Emo here is Tam-Tam.”

“I’d rather be called Mr. Emo than Tam-Tam,” Tam grumbled.

Fitz glanced around the hallway, and several students quickly glanced away, blushing. “Am I crazy, or does it feel like everyone’s watching us?” 

“Well, I may or may not have told everyone that you were suffering from uncontrollable farting. So don’t be surprised if the girls keep their distance,” Keefe grinned.

Tam covered his mouth with his hand to hide his grin.

“Girls?” Fitz asked, uncomprehending. 

“Um, yeah,” Keefe snorted. “Like a guy would give a fart about you.” He doubled over laughing at his own pun.

Fitz feigned laughter. 

_What’s wrong with me?_

“Come on, guys, we’ll be late for study hall,” Tam muttered, pushing Keefe down the hall amid peals of laughter, leaving Fitz to walk awkwardly behind them.

_Probably just an aftereffect of my concussion or something._

“Um, hi?” A small hand waved in front of his face, painted nails sparkling in the light. “Hello?”

“Oh, sorry about that.” Fitz focused his gaze on her, beaming his movie star smile down on her. “Did you want something?” 

The second-year blushed, suddenly shy as she tucked a lock of her short red hair behind one ear. “I just wanted to say, you know, thanks.” She looked up at him, her eyes softening as she smiled. “For everything that you’re doing for us. I heard about you and that boy, and my…” She lowered her voice to a bare whisper. “My girlfriend and I… we just wanted to say, you know, thanks.” 

Fitz gaped at her. “Your _girl_ friend?” 

“Shh,” the second-year glared.

“You just mean like a friend, right?” Fitz laughed hysterically. “I mean, of course you do. Obviously. Wait, what did you hear about me and a boy?”

The girl took a large step back, looking alarmed. 

Fitz held out a hand to her. “I’m sorry. I’m in a really strange mood today. Forgive my rudeness.” He smiled with half of his mouth.

She shook her head. “Just… forget I ever mentioned it, alright?” She took another step back. “Forget we ever met.” She turned, beginning to walk away, before glancing over her shoulder one last time. “And tell Dex I said hi, okay?” She smiled and walked away. 

Fitz glanced around the empty hallway. 

_Dex?_

He put his head in his hands and sat down hard, leaning against the corridor wall. 

_Just a quick nap. My head_ hurts _, God._

Right before he fell asleep, he saw a flash of periwinkle out of the corner of his eye. He tried to call out, but it was too late. 

Fitz slumped against the wall, fast asleep. 

************

_“Surround the place. Operatives one and two, enter and engage contact with hostiles. Aim to stun, but kill if you have to. They’re smarter than you think,” a rough voice yelled over the sound of thudding feet._

_Screams cut through the air as the operatives jumped through the apartment windows. Glass shattered, falling in pieces on the floor._

_“I didn’t do anything,” Keefe begged, lifting a bloody hand up to the goblin soldier. “Please. Please, just tell me what you did to them.”_

_The goblin raised the melder, body taut with distaste for the elven weapon._

_“What did you do to them?” Keefe screamed, clawing at the goblin._

_The soldier growled, pushing Keefe off and stomping on the bloody hand. Ignoring the sickening cracking noise, he fired. Keefe fell backward, shuddering and going stiff. His eyes were still wide with fear, his hand continuing to bleed._

_“No sign of the others?” Operative two stepped into the room, a body slung over her shoulder._

_Operative one shook his head. “Boy doesn’t seem to know where they are either.”_

_“What did you do to his hand?” The female goblin laughed._

_“He wouldn’t shut up,” the male goblin shrugged, picking Keefe up and swinging the boy over his shoulder. He ignored the thud of Keefe’s head against his back. “The queen knows about this, right?”_

_“Of course,” the other replied. “She sent us off herself.”_

**********

Keefe sat bolt upright in bed, the hairs on the back of his neck standing up. He was wide-eyed and cold with fear.

He shook his head and laughed a little, relaxing his posture. 

_Just a dream,_ he thought, climbing out of bed to get a glass of water. 

As he stepped into a patch of moonlight coming through his open window, he glanced down at his hand, flipping it over absentmindedly.

A thin spiderweb of scars crisscrossed the back of his hand, stark against his pale skin. 

He tripped over his own feet in shock, falling flat on his face. 

The knock on his door shocked him even more. “Keefe? Are you okay? I heard a thump.” 

“Yeah, Dad, I’m fine,” Keefe called, pulling himself to his feet and crawling back into bed. 

“Alright, well, goodnight! I love you!”

“Love you too, Dad.” Keefe burrowed deeper into his covers, trying to put the bad dream out of his mind. 

**********

The next morning when he woke, the scars were gone, leaving Keefe to wonder if maybe he’d imagined it after all. 

_I guess it was just a dream._

_But I thought…_

“Keefe!” Cassius yelled. “Time to get ready for school!”

“Coming, Dad,” Keefe yelled back, resolving to put the matter out of his mind.

_Just a dream._


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> muuuuuuuuuushy
> 
> note for my beta reader:
> 
> hi b stop stalking me ily

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

 

“Hey, Dex?” Sophie asked, tugging at her eyelashes and glancing over at him with nervous eyes.

 

“Yeah?” 

 

“Do you… do you know what happened to Keefe?” Her face was pink with shame. “I’m sorry, I know it’s selfish to ask, but-”

 

“They wiped him,” Dex cut her off. 

 

“Did you… did you see it happen?”

 

“No,” Dex said. “But I know. They would never just let him go, not with him knowing what he knows.”

 

“Oh.” 

 

“Sucks to have someone you care about not even know you exist, huh?” His voice was full of bitterness. 

 

Sophie’s eyes started to water. “I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

 

“Just stop, okay?” He turned away from her, unable to meet her gaze. “Just leave me alone. Please.” 

 

“I’m sorry.” 

 

Sophie turned and left the room.   
  


* * *

 

_ She ran a finger across his jawline, making him shiver slightly. “You’re so pretty.” _

 

_ “Pretty? Madam, you wound me.” He clutched his chest as though he had been greatly offended.  _

 

_ “Well, you know,” she shrugged, cheeks slightly pink. “You just… you’re so soft. I know you try to be a ‘man’s man’ or whatever, but you’re really just… sweet. I wish you would let everyone see this side of you.” _

 

_ He shook his head. “How is soft a good thing?” He laughed, eyes slightly cloudy. “I mean, everyone always-” _

 

_ “Shhh.” She pressed a finger to his lips. “Don’t put yourself down like that.”  _

 

_ “You do it all the time.”  _

 

_ She leaned back against him, clutching his hands and wrapping both their arms around herself. “It’s not okay when I do it either,” she admitted. “But it’s hard not to, sometimes. Everyone wants me to be the cure for all their problems, but there’s so much and I’m just… I’m just one person.”  _

 

_ “I know, baby.” He kissed her on the forehead. “That’s why I’m here to help you.” _

 

_ “I’m here for you too, you know.” She twisted around so she was sitting on his lap, resting her head on his shoulder. “Pretty.” She lifted her head and nuzzled her nose against his. _

 

_ “You’re pretty, too.” He fingered her soft blonde hair. “Turn around so I can braid your hair!” _

 

_ “But I want to look at your face!” She whined, pressing a row of kisses up his cheek. She ruffled his hair. “I like your face. Pretty.”  _

 

_ “You’re such a baby,” he scoffed as she wrapped her arms around his neck.  _

 

_ “Mmm hmm,” she nodded, smiling at him. “Hey, can I kiss you?” _

 

_ “As long as you’ll let me braid your hair afterward.” He pulled her closer and pressed his lips to hers.  _

 

_ When they finally drew away, breathless, he began to laugh. “For once, it’s a good thing my dad doesn’t care what I do.”  _

 

_ She sighed. “He cares, I know he does. He just doesn’t understand how to love you.” _

 

_ “How can a person not know how to love?” Keefe asked, his eyes slanting downwards with sadness. “I mean, it’s only natural.” _

 

_ “People learn what they’re taught, babe.” She brushed his hair off of his forehead. “Maybe no one ever loved him. That doesn’t excuse what he’s done, but you can still try and, I don’t know, understand him? It might make things easier.” _

 

_ “Nothing makes it easier,” Keefe said quietly. “I thought he’d be happy about us being together, right? I mean, he loves you and your  _ legacy _ or whatever. But when he found out, all he said was ‘you should be spending more time on your studies and less on your girlfriend, since only one of them is actually going to last.’ Like we’re going to break up at the first sign of trouble.” He looked into her golden brown eyes. “Are we?” _

 

_ “Of course not,” she laughed. “We’ve faced bigger problems than romance. I mean, we beat the Neverseen. We deserve to be happy.”  _

 

_ “Yeah.” He rested his chin on her shoulder, enjoying the warmth of their shared body heat.  _

 

_ “Babe?” _

 

_ “Yeah?” _

 

_ She pulled away slightly so that she could look at him in the face. “You know I love you, right?” _

 

_ A smile broke across his face, his eyes filling with warmth as he looked at her. “I love you too, Sophie,” he said, and pulled her closer, letting their lips meet. _   
  


* * *

 

_ Sophie. _

 

Keefe hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the girl since he’d woken up early that morning, unable to fall back asleep. A human name for an elven girl, a girl who had somehow ended up in his arms. 

 

Had he imagined her? Somehow, he got the feeling he hadn’t. 

 

“Hey, Tam?”

 

Tam didn’t lift his head from the lunch table to answer, his bowl of soup sitting untouched beside him. “Yeah?” He mumbled.

 

“Do we know a girl named Sophie?”

 

At that, Tam looked up, dark bags prominent beneath his silver eyes. “Keefe, are you on drugs?” He asked, apparently serious.

 

“Dude,” Keefe responded, disgusted. “Come on, really?”

 

Tam shrugged. “Look, I don’t know. Your eyes are all red and that’s kind of a stoner question. Sophie is a human name, so there’s no way we would know a girl called that.”

 

“My eyes aren’t red because I’m high, they’re red because I’m tired.” Keefe groaned, burying his face in his hands. “I just keep having these dreams, and I can’t tell-”

 

“If they’re real or not.” 

 

Keefe dropped his hands, looking at Tam with wide eyes. “You too?”

 

Tam waited a minute before speaking. “In my dreams, I have a… a twin sister. She has dark hair and light eyes, like me, but her hair is tipped with silver. But I always wake up before I find out her name, or what she wants.”

 

“There was a girl in my dream last night,” Keefe told him. “Sophie. And she said she loved me, and I don’t even know who she is. 

 

“In the first dream, you… you were hurt,” Keefe continued, his eyes running over Tam’s face. “And they took you, and they said… it was the Goblin Queen. She wanted it to happen.”

 

Tam laughed shakily. “That’s silly. Why would the Queen want us? And why would there be a girl?” He shook his head at Keefe. “You need to go home and get some more sleep.”

 

Keefe waved away the notion. “Eat your food and then we’ll talk, alright?”

 

Tam pulled his soup bowl closer, rolling his eyes. “Whatever, blondie,” he said, trying to tamp down the heat rising in his cheeks.

 

“Shut up, Bangs Boy.” 

 

The two sat there in companionable silence for the rest of lunch.    
  


* * *

 

“Linh?”

 

The two girls sat next to each other, Biana’s dark head resting on Linh’s shoulder.

 

“Mmm hmm,” Linh responded absentmindedly, running her fingers through Biana’s chocolate curls over and over again. 

 

“Do you think he remembers me?” Biana asked in a small voice. “Fitz, I mean.”

 

Linh’s hand stopped moving through Biana’s hair. “I don’t know,” she said after a long beat of silence. “I don’t know what they kept, and what they threw away.”

 

Biana wrapped her arms around Linh’s waist and buried her face in the other girl’s neck. “We have to get him back,” she mumbled, her tears dripping down Linh’s collarbone. 

 

Linh began to stroke Biana’s hair again, whispering soothingly. “We will,” she assured the dark-haired girl. “I promise.” 

 

_ And I know they don’t want to see Tam ever again, but all I want is for him to come home.  _

 

_ I never even got to say goodbye…  _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to my one, singular reader: thank you. i hope you enjoy :)


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